Naturally we include the obligatory autism reference to a piece of jigsaw puzzle!

Because obviously we're the forgotten about pieces of puzzle that go under the sofa yet without us, the jigsaw is incomplete.

Jigsaw
Because you know, its a website about autism so there's got to be the obligatory jigsaw reference!

Thursday 1 February 2018

"People who suffer from autism..."

I don't want to get into any discussion on the correct language of addressing those that have/are autism/autistic. I personally identify as autistic and I feel it is a core part of my being but if other people 'fellow sufferers' like the 'with language', good for them.

What I want to look at is this idea of autism and suffering.

There's the view that autistic people suffer, often stated by parents with autistic children and others who work with autistic people. And yes, I tend to agree actually. There are times when I do suffer and it is not society's fault. There, I said it.

I see people from the autistic community (as if there is actually a formal association!) angrily counter that they do not 'suffer from autism'. The argument is that autism is not a disease and we don't have common observable symptoms as such, for there are infinite ways autism can manifest. 

The view here is that if suffering does occur, it's caused by society and the way it is structured to make life more difficult for autistic people than it should otherwise be. This might be the way society can be so sensory overloading and the way neurotypical people communicate that can isolate autistic people from joining in.

And here I say yes, society is not necessarily configured in ways that always work well for autistic people, but let's stop being naive about how autistic people experience the world and the extent to which society can reasonably accommodate us. Society cannot be blamed for everything and autism is not some special gift. Sometimes we suffer and there is no one to blame. 

Let's get real: I don't particularly like supermarkets. I don't like the lights so I suppose yes, the lights can be dimmed for me. I have seen attempts to make shopping more accommodating for people with sensory processing difficulties. My local shopping centre does a once a month low sensory shopping hour but I can't help but think there is no way to please everyone but I guess it might help a few people, so that is good, right? But it just doesn't go far enough for me but I realise to achieve that, it would be totally unworkable.

But there is the thing about supermarkets for me; I don't like the number of things to look at. Visually, shopping is overloading by the vast amount of people about and the huge number of different products to look at on the shelves with their bright colours and different shapes. So to accommodate my needs, turning down the lights and turning off the music isn't going to help me. The retailer isn't going to remove a load of their products to suit me and how would that benefit other people if what they need is removed from the shop floor?

What is the solution? I think we need to be realistic that society can only do so much to help us autistic people get on in life. There are going to be plenty of scenarios where society does not disable us but it is our environment but it transcends society's reach. So yes, I do suffer. I cannot make the birds stop tweeting, turn down the brightness of the sky or remove people around me. I cannot blame society for doing what they are doing and I cannot change my natural environment either. 

But I can find coping mechanisms. I can wear headphones, wear tinted lenses in my glasses and all sorts but we cannot blame society for this. 

Using the examples of shopping, we could turn back the commerce clock to small shops and buy goods each day and reduce choice and raise costs because perhaps 1 in a 100 people in the UK are autistic and a percentage of those people find shopping hard?! No, that's not going to work and therefore we need to understand that we do suffer.

We cannot deny who we are but I think we need to be honest in what we think the sources of suffering are. I for one don't want to stop being autistic but I do want the world to be quieter. If the medical world can one day help me with that, I won't feel shame to admit that suffering. Or admit that I want it to go. This isn't me being a sellout or rejecting who I am but recognising that society can't be blamed for everything. Sometimes the birds just tweet too loud, and wanting to feel it less is okay.